In my final five weeks of pregnancy, I am well aware of the painstaking process of waiting and working to develop more patience. I am reminded of the scripture that says, “Love is patient…” (I Cor. 13), and am realizing living a life of love means not only patience with others but also patience with myself and my body as new life develops within it.
In a culture where instant gratification is becoming more and more possible and expected, waiting can be tough. Especially when uncertainty is also involved. What we can be certain and mindful of is the existence of this present moment. I am striving to be fully present today with my baby who is already very much alive and with me moment to moment. I can rest in contentment and joy as he kicks and prepares to enter the world. Often my mind wants to jump ahead to five weeks from now…or maybe four? When will he arrive? How will he arrive? What will he be like? How will his brothers receive his arrival? Such ruminative anticipation is both exciting and anxiety-provoking, and it pulls me from the moment. When I come back to the moment I can rest with contentment, knowing God has given me this experience right now and I’m grateful for it.
What uncertainty lies ahead in your life? Are you waiting for something to happen, or for some process to unfold at a quicker pace than it is? I encourage you to embrace the moment, to be in the uncertain midst of the process itself, not just focused on what the outcome will be or when you will arrive at the destination. Be fully present in the midst of the process, open to noticing and fully experiencing the feelings that occur and doing what you can right now to be fully alive.